Missing you.

Hi Grandma, I miss you so much it hurts. You are, or were I am not so good at this whole past tense thing, the one person in this entire world who love me and was proud of me for everything I did. What I would do to get to call you right now and here your voice to give you an update on my life and to hear you tell me a story. Gosh it's something so simple that I should've cherished more. I love you with my whole entire heart and I am so sorry for making such a mess of my life. I hope you are still proud of me. I love you everyday forever and always.

The little things: I miss you.

What I would do to be able to call you right now. I miss you everyday. When you died a piece of me died. I know that you couldn't live forever. But to me you were frozen in time to live forever. It's hard to explain. You were a part of my entire life from the moment I was born. I never knew a life without you until now. I don't like life without you. I know you are with me in my heart everyday. That doesn't make the pain any less real. I love you with my whole entire heart I hope you can feel my love for you. You are with me forever.

Love Happiness and all other things

Lauren & Greg got married two weeks ago March 16th 2013. I did my reading at the wedding and the entire day was incredible. I know you are so happy for them wherever you are right now. You left footprints on our entire family as far as it extends and more. You would've loved the service so I hope you got to see it. I'd like to think you did. Last weekend was easter. I went home as a last minute decision and got to surprise Aunt Lauren Uncle Greg and Jackie. It was the first family holiday without you there. That was tough. We had our annual egg hunt and dad hid eggs for you to find the "grandma eggs" We could not locate one little green or yellow egg. That one was left for you to pick up. We believe that you did. I know you were there with us that day and everyday. I miss you more than anything. Some days like to today it just really hits me that your not here. That's hard. You have always been here through all eighteen years of my life and now a piece of me is just missing. I know you are with us everyday, I swear I can feel you. Sometimes it just doesn't even feel real that you are gone. I love you with my whole heart and that will never change.

Give me a hugget

So I finally remembered what you would call hugs, you would call then huggets. So I'm giving you a hugget right now :) love you grandma.

I miss you.

Hi Grandma,
I've been missing you a lot lately, pretty much miss you everyday. I keep wanting to just be able to call you or write you a letter, or get a letter from you. I don't think I told you enough how much getting a letter from you meant to me. I hope you are being treated very well up there, always the best for you, you take care of people and they will take care of you. So I know you have to be very well taken care of. I thought that maybe I could write to you here, I don't know if you can read this but I just really want you to know how absolutely completely honored I am to be your granddaughter. No one could ever have been more proud of me than you for everything I did no matter how small. So I promise I'll keep on making you proud. I love you with my whole heart forever and always.
Love,
Your Granddaughter
Nicole